I woke up the morning following the cataract surgery for my right eye and was shocked to discover how blue my world was. I wasn’t feeling blue – I was suddenly seeing it. Even though the eye itself was still slightly dilated and blurry, color popped. The sculptured glass hummingbird hanging in the kitchen window was no longer blue-grey and the sky no longer had a yellow tinge. When I went for my morning follow up appointment with my eye surgeon, I hung my coat on the back of the exam room door and to my right eye, inside the hood was bright blue and the outer shell was navy while my left eye perceived the coat as a dull blue with a black outer shell. When Ariel and I went for a walk later in the day, my world was suddenly vibrant through my right eye and still rather dull through my left.
I had not realized how my vision had gradually reduced until my world had become grey. Having the cataract removed and the lens replaced in my right eye enabled me to see clearly while the left eye hadn’t changed.
I find this analogous to Transformation. If you look at an infant, they are fully engaged in what they are seeing and doing. Within a few months, they’re excited and enthusiastic about just about everything. But as we get older, we discover it’s not “cool” to be enthusiastic and those decisions along with disappointments gradually dull our lives. It’s so gradual that it goes unnoticed. We get lost in future expectations or grumblings about how the past should have been different and lose sight of the immediacy of life.
According to my eye surgeon, cataracts are inevitable with age. Your disengagement with life is inevitable also, unless you intercede. It is so tricky, you can’t “intercede” as a “doing”. It has to be an act of self-discovery. However, directing yourself to be present and “in the moment” doesn’t get you there. It’s paradoxical: it’s about engaging fully and at the same time not listening to your thoughts.
It’s about simply being there in your experience.
It’s a delicate balance between doing and being.
It includes slowing down enough to be with whatever you happen to be engaged in, rather than trying to get it over with.
I can’t tell you how to get there – it’s a self-discovery thing. But for now, until I have the next cataract removed, I am having fun seeing my world go from blue to grey and then blue again with just a simple wink.
Perhaps if you look and pay attention, you will see your world go vivid again in a blink as well.