08 May An Ode to My Mom
As I am getting older, I see many of my friends struggling with aging parents or parents that have passed away. I feel very lucky to have met Ariel & Shya Kane when I was in my early thirties. It transformed the relationship I had with my parents. Not sure when or how it happened, but I stopped blaming them for the things they did or didn’t do and started seeing them as people.
A couple of days before my dad passed away, when he was in ICU, he became lucid for long enough for me to assure him that my mom would always be taken care of. I feel lucky I took the time to go see my dad every weekend the last few months of his life when he was in the hospital. During this time, I really got to know my mom and we became friends. After my dad passed away, I continued spending time with my mom almost every weekend. We had fun doing the simplest of things – eating frozen yogurt, getting our nails done, food shopping, and watching our beloved Yankees. It seemed she would always be around. Sometimes my mom would say I spent too much time with her. In my heart I knew if I did not spend this time with her, when would I?
Time marched on and we sold the house my parents lived in and my mom moved to senior living and to be closer to me. The last year and a half of her life was filled doctor visits, hospitals stays, rehab and ultimately hospice. Though it was not always easy or my preference, I am grateful for all the time I was able to spend with my mom. We had a special relationship. A couple of weeks before my mom passed, she told me she was ready to go to the great beyond and that she did not want me to be sad. Then she said, “Thank you for everything.” I know this would not have been possible without transformation. It has been about one and a half years since my mom passed away. I miss her but know she is at peace. I now have another angel watching over me.